Lucy Vodden

Who is Lucy Vodden? She was the woman referred in one of the Beatles' songs Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. This song was so popular before but it gained controversy, and I guess it was also banned, because of the supposed reference to the drug, LSD (Lysergic acid diethylamide). The Beatles denied this allegation and John Lennon explained to the media that his son, the young Julian Lennon, showed him a drawing of Lucy in the sky with diamonds and Lucy and was actually Julian's classmate. The group decided to use it as a title to their new song.

Anyway, Lucy Vodden suffered from the immune disease lupus and died last September 22, 2009. She was 46 years old. She may have died but she will always be remembered as the girl who inspired the one time favorite and popular Beatles song.

(click the image to direct you to the source)

Have A Great Break!

My blog is getting monotonous lately so I’m giving you (myself included) a break. This one of the commercials I’ve seen lately. Enjoy watching!

Long Lost Friend

Last week, I was elated to find my long lost friend thru Facebook. I was actually been searching for her in the past few months, but to no avail. So imagine my excitement as I opened my FB account after I received an email that she invited me to be her friend. She was my best friend in grade school. Actually, it was kinda odd that we became best buddies. She was quite maldita while I was naive. Almost everyone in our class was intimidated by her presence but I got no choice because our teacher had assigned me to a seat beside hers. One time, she told me that if two friends bickered but made peace after, it means to say that they really were best of friends. I didn't get it right away because in the first place, I didn't really consider her to be my best bud :D...

One day, she stopped talking to me. I didn't even know what was going on and what was wrong with her. It lasted for a week. After that, she gave me an apple mango and told me that from then on, we were best of friends, hehe.. So childish (but we were) and so I had my first best friend.

Later, however, I transferred to another school in another city and we kept in touch through writing letters. Sometimes, we tried contacting each other using our dads' antenna/aerial radios (walkie-talkies were very popular at that time). A few years later, I returned and was very eager to see her again. But my mom enrolled me to another school. It didn't matter though coz we lived in the same city again. At one time, she visited me at my house and I was so surprised to see how tall she had become. It was quite intimidating, you know, hehe. It gave me a stiff-neck (guess she was about 5'8 compared to my 5'4 frame). Anyway, it was quite odd. I had returned but we didn't get to see each other often.

After I graduated from high school, I enrolled in one of the Universities and we crossed paths again. Although we took different courses, we always took the time to talk and ask how we've been. Gosh, she was getting taller- my neck hurt! - I told her that actually and she just laughed. She was also very, very pretty-- stunning, actually. Standing next to her, I was plain and ordinary, ugh!

Our last conversation was when she told me she was going to continue her studies and would probably live down south for good. After that, I never heard from her.

But thanks to FB, we found each other after many years. At least now I know that she got married already, has a pretty daughter and is on the family way. I guess Social Networks really offer a lot of advantages. It may be discouraging for some but in my case, I am amazed. It's such an easy way to get reconnected with long lost friends :)

It Comes in Threes

They say that when you're feeling happy or feeling down, it comes in threes. Unfortunately, I'm experiencing the latter. Don't I deserve a little happiness here? Okay, I'm waiting for the other worst things to happen so, c'mmon, I'm waiting!

We are having some problems that we are trying to solve. Actually, we can solve it by ourselves but we need to sacrifice many things. But that's okay, as long as the decision was mutually done and I was included. However, some people were trying to butt in and I was only consulted when everything was finalized. Okay, I don't think consulted was the right word, maybe informed(?!).

I appreciated that some of these people were trying to help, but most of the time, almost all of their decisions were being followed. What am I? A post? A wall? That was why I felt like we were spineless, like we have no backbone. These people may be happy but I'm not! It's frustrating. Why am I such a loser? I really felt helpless and as if I was at their mercy most of the time. I'm so pissed off I can't even think of anything sensible thing today. Oh, I'm blogging which is good, I guess, but still I'm whining and ranting my misfortunes over here! Can anybody at least break this chain? I've had enough jinx in my life!

The Kite Runner

I'm not a TV addict and that's why we don't need cable. But sometimes, I get the urge to watch something on the TV and hope there's a good and sensible show as I'm so critical of the actors' acting, including the extras.

We were in a hotel one time and I was browsing the cable channel for a good show. I switched to MTV, V-Channel, AXN, Discovery channel but I got so bored so I checked on HBO. I didn't understand the language, it was a foreign film but there was a translation. I wondered which country was featured. I then concluded that it must be in Turkey after the little boy called his father 'baba'. But then I thought maybe the middle eastern people all call their fathers Baba. I tried switching to other channels but I kept going back to HBO. I was curious about the life story of these 2 little boys, Amir and Hassan, who used to be best of friends and who loved to fly kites when they were small, but suddenly their friendship faltered because of one incident. Later in that show, Amir and his father escaped their country because it was invaded by Russians, and they ended up living in the U.S. of A. Good, they finally speak English. My husband joined me later and wondered why I was watching such a show. Then, he told me the story was familiar. He remembered having read the book, until he got it: The Kite Runner authored by Khaled Hosseini.

I won't go into details about the plot of the story but it was very touching. It gave me a glimpse of the life of our muslim brethren, how they suffered such humiliation by their own race (courtesy of the Talibans) and it made me understand their culture, too.

I was moved by the story especially of the father's love for his son. And the grown up Amir trying to resolve the betrayal he had made to his best friend. It has a good ending, the kind of drama that I really appreciated watching.

(image source: click images)

Breathe!

I'm a little bit irritated today because of one phone call. Some people are so tactless, thoughtless and as if they have the power to let you do things in a snap. Yeah, okay, go ahead, you're always right. No wonder some people couldn't stand you. I'm trying to be polite but it can't be helped that I sometimes explode. Good thing I kept quiet this evening while conversing on the phone (I was actually controlling my every nerve). I wonder if I should go on with my motto, an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. I used to be very vindictive and I might do this to you if, heaven forbid, I can hold no longer.

Undecided

I've been buying books lately even though I don't have leisure time to read them right away. Now, I've decided to start reading at least one of them but I got confused which book will I read first. Undecided, I ended up not reading to any of them, hehe. My husband took the privilege of being the first one to read my new, unscathed, unopened books.

Guess I'll just continue watching the DVD shows which my friend lent it to me a few months ago (so that I can return it to her, too). Gosh, even in DVD's, I can't decide which one will I start watching first, hehehe...

Migraine

Throbbing pain, it's pulsating, it made me dizzy. It aches, it hurts, it made me wanna puke, and it's numbing my head... That's how I felt every time I'm having migraine. I had it this afternoon. This usually happens if I'm expose to extreme temperature (extreme hot or cold).

A dose of medicine would usually help me, but sometimes, I use a liniment to massage my head but a good sleep or nap is alleviating, too. I took the latter and woke up feeling refreshed. Glad I had my strength back, energized and feeling great.

It's really important to take care of our health, especially that our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.

(click image to direct you to the source)

Only You My Friend

I've been searching for a lyric of this song. This used to be one of my favorite songs during my teenybopper days. I thought it was Jamie Rivera who sang this song but found out it was a certain Maria Muriel. Big thanks to the one who uploaded this on Youtube (link: click HERE). I've tried writing down the lyrics and hope I did it right.

Only you my friend can make my life feel so complete
It seems like a song, a symphony, a melody so sweet
Of all the people around, you’re the dearest one I found
You will always be special for me

Only you my friend can make my day feel bright and clear
Every moment’s filled with happiness as long as you’re near
When I happen to fall, you are there each time I call
You’re the most important one of all.

Chorus:

Nothing else is greater than the friendship that we have
You mean everything to me
I can never pretend, that I’ll love you till the end
But I’ll remember you, my whole life through.
(I’ll remember you, I’ll remember you
I’ll remember you my whole life thru)

It makes such a difference when it’s you who gives his smile
You would make me feel much better in just awhile
And when you got up I shall look behind
And memories of my mind
I will never find anyone like you (Chorus)

One Last Hug

I visited my dad's grave this high noon. I've been wanting to visit him few weeks ago but due to time constraint and health reason I was not able to do so. Before I went there, I visited a church first, offered a prayer and lit a candle. It's one of the things that I wanted to do, too. The church was ran by nuns and the place was very solemn, good for contemplating because it's not situated at the heart of the city. The time was already 11:00 am and my heart was racing when I thought of visiting my dad. My dad's grave was at the opposite side of the church where I was praying. But I badly wanna "see" my dad. I brought the car with me anyway. So, after I said my prayer, I drove the car and hurried to go the 'garden'.

It was very hot when I arrived because of the traffic. I don't even mind the noisy planes arriving and departing. Being with my dad was all that matters. I stood there, feeling alone and very much missing him. I wish he was physically present and feel his one last hug. And without knowing it, I was crying uncontrollably. All the while I thought I was okay. For the past few weeks/days, I've managed to be ok. But I've realized I was just a great pretender. I was not okay at all and I wanted badly for someone to hear me out - that would've been my dad. I know I am also surrounded with people that I could rely on, but I ended up being misinterpreted. A good cry and hearing me out with my woes are probably the things that would ease me out, without someone criticizing me especially when I am this fragile.

Flash back:

My dad was still alive when one time I was feeling down. We talked over the phone (long-distance) and I suddenly cried so hard. I didn't give him my explanation of crying because I didn't know what I was crying about. I think I had a crisis unresolved then. He told me to talk to my mom. I would love, too, but most of the time, we ended up arguing. As I've said, I'm always misinterpreted. I just want somebody to listen and not to look at my flaws. Sure, I'm not perfect and I hated myself for being defensive in the end. Anyway, I ended up drinking the whole grande of beer that night and woke up so groggy and nauseated, to think I still have to go to work that day....

After a few days, my dad was back at home. He didn't ask further what had happened instead he showed me something. He told me to take good care of it. It was an acoustic guitar and until now, it's still with me, still good as new. Too bad I'm not a good guitar player like my brothers but at least I knew how to strum and read the chords. But my dad knew how to lighten me up. I smiled that day...

Flash back more than 8 years ago:

My dad was dying. He used to be huge but at that time, he was so skinny already. He talked to me and then we hugged for a very long time. I could almost feel his bone that I was afraid I might break it. But I love that man so much, he was my dad and not even the smell of his metastasize cancer cells would hinder me from hugging him. It was our one last hug and I cried so much that day because I knew I would be missing him. I've accepted his fate but the thought of not seeing him anymore would really break my heart.

Today:

I was reminded of all those things while I poured my heart out. I want his one last hug again. I even wished he would appear in front of me but it didn't happen. I just felt a strong wind while I was sobbing and wiping my eyes and nose. I didn't mind if some people saw me there. I had a deep 'talk' with my dad. When my dad died, I appreciated the beauty of death. However, this noon, I thought about it but told myself I wasn't ready yet. I have a young child and I want her to know her mommy very well. I want her to experience having a parent while growing up. I ended up praying to God and to my dad that, 'Not now', and I giggled afterward. The thought of my daughter told me to go home already. But if I have nothing else to think, guess I would have lasted the whole day staying at my dad's grave.

As I drove home, I was reminded of Luther Vandross' Dance with my Father that has a very meaningful lyric:

"If I could get another chance
Another walk, another dance with him
I'd play a song that would never, ever end
How I'd love, love, love to dance with my father again"

Now, guess I can say I'm okay. A good cry is what I need. I always find solace when I visit his grave but I also promised my dad that I will be smiling the next time I am going to visit him.